Nurturing Compassionate and Responsible Humans and Communities
Hello! I am the Stephanie of Supportive Stephanie. I am an educator in the beautiful Pacific Northwest. I have worked in high needs elementary schools for nearly two decades and have learned a lot of hard won lessons about what humans need to thrive.
Like most passions in life, Supportive Stephanie was born out of crisis. I didn’t realize just how not OK I was until my best friend had to drive me to the emergency room instead of spend a lovely Sunday with her family. One year before, the COVID pandemic had hit hard. At first, it was a huge relief. I was struggling. I was doing all the things I knew to do in my classroom and nothing worked. I spent my days waiting to see not if the other shoe dropped, but how many times. I hated the way it impacted my ability to be a parent and a wife. I was worried that I would start to hate myself.
So I started asking questions. I asked questions to myself. I asked questions of the people I loved. I asked questions to the internet and researched anyone that said something that resonated with me. As I learned more, it transformed not only my mental health but my relationships and how I approach working with kids. Now, I want to share it with you. My hope is that maybe you can find support before you find yourself in the ER.
Here I share what I have learned about caring for yourself, caring for others and making the world a better place.
The Foundation
Listen. I know I am not the smartest person in the room. None of this is my idea. I lean heavily on the work of leaders in their fields. What I do is think. A lot. This represents my point of view. How I see all these different ideas fit together and show up in the classroom. My vision is the synthesis of what I have learned from:
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Trauma Informed Discipline: Positive Discipline, Dr. Jane Nelsen
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Love and Logic Jim Fay, Charles Fay and Foster Cline
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Maslow’s Hierarchy of Needs
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Resiliency window ( Window of Tolerance) from the work of Dr Dan Siegel MD
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Shame, Guilt, Empathy work of Brene Brown
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Raising An Emotionally Intelligent Child: Drs. John and Julie Gottman
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Burnout: The Secret to Unlocking the Stress Cycle Emily Nagoski PHD, Amelia Nagoski, DMA
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Emotional Intelligence Peter Salovey and John D Mayer
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Self-Compassion Dr. Kristin Neff
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Restorative Justice
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Trauma Stewardship: An Everyday Guide to Caring for Self While Caring for Others Bonnie Burk and Laura van Dernoot Lipsky
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Psychological Safety
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Beyond Behavior: Mona Delahooke Ph.D.
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Zones of Regulation
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De-escalation: Patrick Mulick
- Revolutionary Love: Valarie Kaur
F.A.Q
Q: If you could only give one piece of advice, what would it be?
A: Hmmm. I would say learn and practice self-compassion. Being your own worst critic is part of the human experience. Except, living things cannot grow where they are not safe.
Q: Are you a night owl or an early bird?
A: I am totally a night owl. Feel free to ask my sister-in-law. It is better to wait until I have had a few sips of coffee.